Social dancing works so well partly because the physical environment is specifically designed to promote interaction. Dancer Ben Bogart says, "I like the social dance thing because there is music, loud enough to feel but low enough to allow conversation, as opposed to music so loud you get horse from yelling in someone's ear from an inch away." Sunday nights at Divino Lounge (7345 Wisconsin Ave.) are a great example. The lights are soft to create a relaxed vibe, but still bright enough to see everyone. You see as many people chatting on the comfy couches surrounding the dancefloor as you do on the dancefloor itself. Alcoholic beverages aren't the featured attraction, people are. Dancer Selena Caldera coments, "I think one of the best parts of a milonga (the argentine word for tango party) is the comraderie of the event - everyone's there to dance, enjoy music, and have fun."

In a typical nightclub, I never get this feeling of comraderie. Each person or group is separated and isolated by the physical environment. In general, it's too dark to see anyone and too loud to talk to anyone. I sometimes think that nightclub owners intentionally make it as difficult as possible for me to interact with other people, perhaps hoping that, in desperation, I might just buy more drinks. Now, I like a martini as much as the next gal, but if that were all that I wanted, I could make it myself, at home, alone. When I go out, I want to have fun, relax, interact with people, maybe meet someone new, and go home with a positive experience that will somehow enrich my life. The martini gets mixed in there somewhere between having fun and going home with a positive experience. I think there is more to be had than what swirls in the glass, and I think the social dance revival might point out what it is.

There is a real need that is not being met by existing nightclubs and bars. Social dancing is winning people over in droves, largely because, whether you show up by yourself or with friends, you will always find a place in the larger group, the "community" of the room, so to speak. Dancer Andrea Thompson compares the two experiences: "It's a big deal to strike up a conversation with a stranger in a bar; it's acknowledged that the only reason to do so is to "hook up." But you can ask anyone to dance, and accept any dance invitation, without it being so loaded with meaning. It takes the pressure off for both of you."

If you venture over to the Chevy Chase Ballroom (5207 Wisconsin Ave.) for swing dancing on a Friday night, youll quickly find yourself amid lively and frequent conversations. There are a plethora of easy topics to choose from, like "How did you begin dancing," "Where do you take lessons," and "Where else do you go dancing." It's virtually impossible NOT to end up talking to someone (in between dances of course) even though this venue is only a dance studio dressed up for the occasion. At a social dance event, you already have something in common with that stranger next to you, and so it's natural to talk together. I think that's what stops us, even more than the environmental obstacles - the absence of common ground. Whats my "excuse" for approaching that person on the other side of the room? And what the hell do I do once I get there? Social dancing provides the perfect answer to both quandaries. "Would you like to dance" is the only opening line that never sounds contrived, and dancing itself is a fun and mostly straightforward protocol for getting to know someone.

In addition to its function as the ultimate ice-breaker, dancing encourages imagination, physical coordination, and personal expression, all of which contribute to a healthy lifestyle. When we practice these things in any context, and especially in a social dance environment, we become more attractive to each other. The ability to communicate in "dance language" is becoming recognized as a valuable skill, a kind of social currency that not only gets to access to communities in your own city but in nearly every city around the world.
Consider Ooh La La in Dupont Circle, where you can dance salsa every Saturday night. Also a restaurant and lounge, Ooh La La has that magic balance of laid-back and hip/trendy vibes that identifies it as an ideal social dance venue. A tango or a salsa is a brief but intriguing conversation between two people, and when you substitute the physical language of dance for the verbal language of words, astonishing things can happen. One immediate result is the ability to make better and quicker decisions about whom we are drawn to (or not). Another is the phenomenon of forming long-lasting acquaintences within minutes. Years later I have kept in touch with partners I danced with for less than 15 minutes. The non-verbal "dance encounter" creates a strong connection.

Of course, in order to plug in to the social dance network, you've got to swallow your pride and commit to some dance lessons. Young Americans seem a bit 'socially disabled' to me because partner dancing, though not a modern invention, has been buried by the last couple of generations. Heres a quick social dance history lesson:
Tango, Swing, and Salsa emerged as concrete dance forms and rose to their greatest popularity roughly between the 1930s-1950s. Most versions of swing as we know them today are indebted to the creative work of a core community of black dancers in Harlem. As the mainstream public discovered them, the dance spread around the country and became the standard social activity for American youth. FYI, this early phenomenon is captured in a one-of-a-kind documentary called The Spirit Moves, available from danieltrenner.com.

What we know today as salsa is the product of a rich legacy of latin dance and music going back nearly 200 years. Cuban son, danzon, and mambo are a few key predeccessors of salsa. In Havana, they still call salsa, "casino," because it was first danced in the city casinos during the 1950s. From there, Cubans and Puerto Ricans carried it to Miami and NYC, where it was subsequently given the name salsa, and where it has continued to evolve and expand throughout North America, incorporating jazz, hip-hop, and countless other contemporary influences.

In Argentina, the tango existed in a parallel universe during these same decades, concealed from the rest of the world but characterized by equally as strong a force. During the Golden Age, records claim that about half the population of Buenos Aires went out dancing every night. Some European tourists, in particular the French, brought seedlings of tango back with them from their travels in South America, and there they grew into a ballroom dance by the same name. The authentic Argentine tango wasn't truly unleashed upon the world, however, until the mid-eighties, when "tango for export" was created in the form of Broadway shows and touring orchestras.

Swing and Salsa, while they never died out completely, had some competition in the U.S. through the 1960s-1980s, while disco and freestyle dancing temporarily replaced partner dancing as the modus operandi of popular social culture. We are now in revival mode, however, as we rediscover the authentic social dance forms, and the power they hold to unite us as a community and as an active social network.

If the notion of dance lessons seems daunting, keep in mind that anything worth doing is worth doing well. It will require a little patience and effort, but in fact the learning process itself is a great opportunity to make new friends, and to discover a thing or two about yourself. Addressing the challenge, laughing at mistakes, and venturing onto the dance floor for the first time are rites of passage that every dancer has experienced. Just remember that an exciting social universe awaits you on the other side.

© copyright Sharna Fabiano 2003
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